At 42 years old I still have nightmares.

You wouldn’t think that at 42 one would still be having full on “can’t get back to sleep” nightmares. But, I do.

Last nights was a particularly tough one. I would wake in my bedroom at my parents house, I would feel something was wrong. Then decide to leave the room.

What you need to know is that my bedroom doesn’t have a door, it has stairs leading down to the main part of the upper floor of the house.

I start to walk down the stairs and get a strong “sinking feeling”, I’ve died a d by walking down the stairs I’ll moving on, not to a good place.

It becomes clear that when I get to the bottom of the stairs I will be tortured. But, I can seem to retreat back to my room. I can only keep going forward to a horrifying future.

I arrive, horror awaits, endless torture, I pass out.

When I come around in back in my room. The process begins again, except the destination changes, it’s another kind to horror. From what I can remember one time it was not being able to breath, another was existing in 2 dimensions, another was being blinded, and of course the traditional daemons with pitchfork stuff.

One the couple of times I was able to retreat to my room, a being comes back with me. It persuades me to go down, being stuck in room would be a far worse agony.

Thankfully I did wake. It took me a while to get back to sleep. The worry it was really going to happen loomed at the back of mind for a long time.

I suspect I know what the dream is linked to. Something I’ll dicuss with my therapist tomorrow, and share with you all soon.

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